LAFAYETTE, LA – In a move that is still causing a huge ongiong backlash within the area, Lafayette City Park revealed its final choice for its official name early last week – and it was not the result that most were hoping for.
The new name of the park was revealed to be Moncus Park at The Horse Farm, named after revered local rich guy and all-round… rich guy, James Moncus. However, this was more than a stones-throw away from the public’s preferred choice of the Sharon Moss Recreational Area, and locals are none too happy.
Area resident and park regular/dog-poop dropper Steph Hewitz explained how she was disappointed with the outcome.
“I feel like we should be honoring the true heroes of Lafayette”, she said, “And although I’m sure that Mr. Moncus does a lot for the community, nobody comes close to selling a soft-top Mercedes like Sharon Moss does. Such style, such panache. She makes us all feel like filthy, broke peasants, drifting through the passage of time without a true existence, giving us endless reasons to quietly sit through our great train ride of constant worthlessness. And we love it. This should have been for her.”
Local resident Paula Lavelo, who had been masterminding the push to name the park after Sharon Moss, said that she thinks an opportunity has been missed.
“It’s not just the name that we were looking for, but everything that comes along with it”, she explained. “We had big plans for the Sharon Moss Recreational Area. For instance, we were looking to get a splash pad installed that contained only spring water, filtered naturally through the mountains the Scottish Highlands. We also were hoping to put plans forward for a go-kart track that included miniature BMW’s instead of actual go-karts. So you see, this wasn’t just a name – this was a complete package. But it’s all over now, and we must accept the decision and move on.”