LAFAYETTE, LA – Like something straight out of Gangs of New York, the annual crime wave has fallen upon the state of Louisiana once again. It is that time of year when the streets ain’t safe, and when the best thing you can do is lock your doors and windows and ride it out.

Yes, Girl Scout Cookie season is here.

And according to local authorities the crime won’t be going away this year either. Despite Girl Scout cookie season only being open for less than a week, there has already been numerous reports of turf wars in the state – rival gangs of Girl Scouts and their hired muscle, that claim as much territory to sling their goods as possible.

Just four days ago the Garden District of Alexandria was the scene of a brutal stand-off between the Baker St. Bootleggers and the Third Grade Thrillaz, which saw almost $21,000 worth of cookies destroyed.

This incident was followed a day later by another turf war in the upper-class Graywood estate of Lake Charles, where the Big Lake Rebels sparred with the Highway Clown Gang (famed for their Juggalo-style painted faces) over what was believed to have been the luring of customers from one gang to the other.

And as Officer Robert Peacock of the Lafayette Police Department explains, the issues are now emerging in the area.

“Now that Girl Scout cookie season is back, we’re beginning to see these turf wars and gang violence appear in numerous areas across the state”, he said, “Alexandria, Baton Rouge, Lake Charles. Even Arkansas has had issues in Monroe and Shreveport. And now we’re beginning to see the first little bits of trouble here in Lafayette.”

Officer Peacock informed the public of who the main players were here in the area.

“You’ve got quite a big presence here in Lafayette, with five main Girl Scout gangs”, he explained, “The big dogs are the Southside Syndicate, who control most of the Southside. A huge market. The there’s the E.S.F.W. (Empty Souls, Full Wallet) who are the River Ranch crowd. Small, but really well financially-backed. Then you’ve got the Johnston St. Classics who tend to control the middle-ground of the city. Northside is pretty much under the control of the Northside Sliders, the UL area is home to the Saint Streets Stampers, and Youngsvillewell, in true Youngsville style they’re still voting on a name, and have been for the past five years.”

And Officer Peacock urged the public to play it’s part in keeping the streets safe.

“If you see something, say something”, he said, “Buy your cookies safely, and just be aware where your money is going, or who it is funding. We want to see as little bloodshed as possible this year.”

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