With the Offensive Coordinator’s spot available at UL, we take a look at some of the viable candidates, and the attribute that they would bring to the table.

1Tim Tebow – Spirituality

Perhaps it’s that the Ragin Cajuns need a man of faith as well as someone who knows how to somewhat throw a ball. Timmy would tap into the spiritual-side of UL’s offensive line and give the Lafayette faithful even more reason to ‘send prayers’.

2Robert ‘Bobby’ Boucher Jr – Game Winning Mentality

When it comes to providing UL with someone who can win games on their own, there’s nobody who comes close to Bobby Boucher Jr. After a hugely successful spell with The University of Louisiana Cougars, he wouldn’t take much coercing into a chance to bring glory to another Louisiana team.

3Rob Ryan – Basically Not A Defensive Coach

After deciding that coaching defense just isn’t for him, rumor has it that Rob would relish the chance to coach the offensive side of the game. He would plan on using his newly developed plays, including the Burning Dumpster Blitz.

4Bebop & Rocksteady – Aggression

UL has been screaming our for more aggression in their offense, and with these two heading the coaching side of things, that is exactly what fans could expect to see. These fellas grit and determination would no doubt rub off on the team.

5Ben Carson – Calculation

Dr. Ben’s calculated, scientific approach could be just what the UL offense needs, as opposed to their usual tactics of running about like headless chickens. Underneath the open seating end of the field would also be an ideal place to store grain.

6This Little Turd – Confidence

Look at this little brat. Look at him. He thinks he could take down a bear, when really he couldn’t fight his way out of a wet paper bag. But you know what? Sometimes that’s what you need on the O-line. Belief. Get this kid onto the coaching staff now, UL.

7Stanley the Bulldog From Down the Street – Bulldog-like Mentality

When you’re O-line needs a bulldog-like mentality, it’s baffling that so many people overlook, well, bulldogs. Think about it. They have the right state of mind. They catch 95% of anything you throw to them. Put them on a field and you can guarantee that you’ll see semi-decent athleticism for a species with a large mass. Add that to the high-probability that he’ll just want to be paid in Milk-Bone’s, it just makes sense.

 

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